I know you wonder if you’ll ever feel safe again.
Your self esteem may seem unrecoverable.
You don’t know what to do next.
You see your life stretched out in front of you all the way to the horizon and you have no idea what to do.
Do any of these thoughts seem familiar to you? You may be in shock, you may be angry and feel that life isn’t fair, but I’m here to tell you this can lead to the best time of your life. You may think I’m smoking something, but stay with me… the near future may not be easy or pleasant but it can set you up to build your future from ( quite literally) scratch.
Instead of the general meaning of OMG, which I’m sure is what you are feeling; but I am referring to this,
Making choices
Growing your future
Three simple steps, simple but requiring courage on your part to believe in yourself, set your sights and keep going until you have what you want. So what do I mean “courage”, I simply mean doing what you consider to be the right thing, even when you are scared. You may be scared many times in the upcoming months, but you’ll survive. How do I know? I went through a similar “earthquake” in my life almost fourteen years ago. And though it took some time, I am so grateful I was let go at the time I was, so I could build a life that I love doing what I love to do!
I was let go “out of the blue”. I had been successful in my work but the company decided to reduce the funding to the business line I was apart of. Many people were let go at the same time, just like now. Some of my colleagues were bitter and angry, but I learned to let go of those feelings because there was nothing personal meant by this “force reduction”. Nobody was out to get me, I was “collateral damage” that’s all, probably as you are today. Find a way to release any anger you may feel, it compromises your judgment.
Right after this happened I vowed to myself I wouldn’t make any drastic changes to my life. Losing your job puts you in a form of mourning, and you don’t make great choices when you are in that state.
First things first, assess your financial status. Think seriously about unemployment compensation if you are eligible. Back your pride down and take a stark look at what you spend your money on, and how much you really need to survive. Think about your life (and your family’s life) from a zero-based budgeting perspective. Everything needs to be on the table for discussion. You need everyone’s cooperation in a team effort to get through this setback. Don’t scare the kids, but don’t protect them too much, this is a real life experience that they can learn from too. Decide what you need and determine what you may have to do to keep things going. If you have to take a job for the cash flow, go ahead, but realize it is just a means to an end (e.g. finding work that will fulfill you and provide the living you need).
O – Opportunity
This may be the only time in your life that you get to make career decisions with the maturity and experience you have now. You may have not even chosen the career you are just leaving, you took a job. Or you may have chosen you past employment when you were just out of school. Would you go out on the street today and ask an 18 or 22 year old what you should do with your life? Probably not. Think about all the interests and skills you have accrued so far. What things have you really enjoyed doing? What do you do very well?
Go to the library, pick up books that interest you and you’ll start to see some patterns, or elements that you have been interested in. These are the beginnings of finding a life’s work. Don’t think, I really like golf, but I can’t make a living playing golf. Think about what it is you like about golf, is it the challenge, the strategy, the outdoors. Dissect your passions and see what elements you want from your next position.
M – Making decisions
When you can determine what you want in your next job, you have something that you can compare to job opportunities that arise. You may find after even a short while, you want to be needed so much you’ll take anything offered. The chances are good you won’t stay if it doesn’t fit your values and you’ll be back on the street with another line on your resume. Decide you’ll be patient, and do things that make sense. Go to networking meetings. Meet with friends, colleagues, people who do what you think you’d like to do. Try different contact methods so you can see what works and what doesn’t. Make sure the people you meet know what you are looking for in terms of position, they may know someone.
You are more likely to find a job through relationships than through sending hundreds of resumes. Decide what you can do to move yourself forward, and take some action everyday that you are proud of. Be accountable to someone, a coach, a friend, a mentor, but answer to someone who can keep you on track.
G – Growing the future
This is more than just finding your next paycheck. It is about the kind of life you want to live. Rethink all the priorities you had up till now, and decide what makes sense now. What do you value most? What choices could you make to honor that?
Take care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. This is a stressful period and you need to take yourself seriously. What things have you not had time for because of your old job? What do you want to put back in your life? What would be good for you?
You have unlimited possibilities. Let yourself dream again. What would you do if you knew you would succeed? What impact would you like to have on the world, your community, your family?
How do I know this? I know this because I went through the same fears and worries, took action, corrected my course when necessary and I won! In my career as a business and executive coach I have helped many people work through the process and find work that fits for them as well. I have a great career I love. I have everything in life that has meaning and value for me. I am good at my work, and satisfied that I am making a contribution to the world. Who could ask for more? It all began with a crisis just like yours.
What’s ahead for you? You can decide and go for it, good luck!