Tis the season when we are called upon to deliver end of the year performance reviews. Hardly what most people regard as a task of “good cheer.” While these are crucial conversations which can be pleasant, more often they are difficult. Even top performers need guidance, and of course there are those who have slipped or not lived up to their potential. If you tend to avoid conflict or are simply feeling too busy with other end of year duties, performance reviews may feel like a dreaded end of year duty.

Still your better side knows that these conversations give us permission to engage in the tough love conversation at a time when people are expecting it; and it’s a time to deliver well deserved praise to top people looking for ideas to accelerate their careers. If you do it well, you will provide meaningful guidance to the entire team and lift overall performance by encouraging the behaviors and reinforcing the valules that make you successful.

Last week we started coaching a CFO and his senior leaders who had implemented a new performance review system. The goal was to improve organizational effectiveness and efficiency and also tie compensation in a more meaningful way to job performance. Even these seasoned leaders acknowledged that they frequently run into issues that trip them up as they deliver feedback. While they didn’t anticipate it would be terribly difficult to implement the new system they had no trouble coming up with case studies from past experiences that highlighted these untenable situations. For example:

1. An employee who sits silently through a performance review, nods their head, says she understands, and then walks out the door and does nothing to address the issue

2. An employee who has always received high marks receives a less than superior rating and storms out of the office

3. An employee who does a great job with an old system but gets tears in her eyes when you tell her that she needs to learn a new way of doing something.

These are just three examples - you can probably think of dozens.
The question then becomes, how to prepare for these sometimes difficult conversations.

Here are 5 tips that will help you turn performance feedback into one of your favorite times of year.

1. Prepare, prepare, prepare. The performance review doesn’t begin and end with the form you fill out. Think about what you want to say. How will you introduce the topic? How will you frame the issue? What words and phrases will best convey your point? And what tone will you take?

2. Engage each person in a dialogue. You need to uncover the obstacles and objections, and the only way to do that is to encourage questions and have a real conversation. Some people are better able to process in the moment than others so you do need to be respectful if they are flabbergasted by the feedback. For the most part, people will tell you what they think and even if they are hurt they will be open to discussing how they can address the issues.

3. Listen, listen, listen. You may believe you’ve made your point and then hear through the grapevine after your conversation that the individual didn’t “get it.” You can avoid this by asking more questions, listening to what is said and NOT said, and noting body language and tone. If you aren’t hearing what you hope to hear then take a break and suggest getting together again soon; within the nexxt 24 hours if possible.

4. Give it time. An hour is a good guideline. Even if you think you can complete a review in 15 or 20 minutes, the individual may have other ideas. They often see this as a time to connect with you, or to get career guidance, so don’t shortchange them. In fact, your high performers should get more time, not less. Don’t assume just because they’re doing a great job that they don’t want to hear it from you.

5. Talk with your coach, mentor, or a colleague about how to improve your performance feedback. Become the kind of boss everyone wants to work for. Think of a boss you respected and seek their guidance or at least recall what they did that brought out the best in you.

Finally, remember that providing constructive guidance is not something that just happens at performance review time; it’s a year round tool for improving organizational performance. If you’re doing it well, when you sit down in December or at the end of your fiscal year, virtually nothing you say should come as a surprise.